Even if you are a completely non-religious person, you should still take a closer look at some Buddhist concepts, as they can help you drown out the negative voice of the mind and take control of toxic emotions through meditation and positive internal dialogue.
As strange as it may seem to you, the world of emotions is one of the areas where Buddhism and Western psychology have the most common ground.
So, for example, both approaches lead us to understand the simple fact that our emotions open up a great path to self-knowledge. Well, this, in turn, helps to engage in self-improvement, as well as to be true to their moral attitudes and beliefs.
If we pay attention to these Buddhist concepts and apply them to our lives, we can not only improve our physical and psychological health, but also gain a much deeper and more complete understanding of our true nature.
In addition, it should be noted that practices such as meditation are not just included in many methods of personal development and are used by psychotherapists. Meditation is an effective way to control the two forces that make our lives a living hell: stress and anxiety.
In this article, we will introduce you to three key aspects of the essence of Buddhism that allow you to take a fresh look at your emotions and learn a lot from them.
Attachment to suffering or freedom to be happy: you choose
On the path to greater freedom and wisdom, acknowledging that we are experiencing certain emotions and looking them in the eyes is essential.
Among other things, it helps to remember everything that happened to us in the past and is happening right now, to fill these stories with meaning and, perhaps, even work through with the help of psychotherapy.
However, Buddhists believe that we should approach all this a little differently: they argue that we should gradually learn to “moderate” and “drown” our negative emotions, but not shutting our eyes to them, but through the practice of positive internal dialogue and meditation.
In addition, the foundations of Buddhism help us to realize that in our habitual approach to dealing with our own emotions, we often make serious mistakes that significantly affect our lives.
For example, many of us believe that happiness can be found from outside sources, be it a partner, a place to live, or some kind of property. However, this kind of materialism, or focusing our attention on what does not belong to us, and what we will not necessarily be able to get, in fact only leads us to unhappiness.
After all, the real feeling of happiness and well-being can be found not somewhere out there, but only inside one’s own soul. Yes, yes, we can find it in our own soul and mind, if we look at them through the prism of calmness, balance and self-acceptance.
That is why, if we want to learn how to control emotions, it is worth starting to practice greater detachment from the material world.
When we shake off, at least to a small extent, the tendency to grieve and grieve over all those things and people that we dream of, that we don’t have, or that we are convinced we should have, we can finally discover eyes, and see what we really have, here and now. Only then can we learn to be happy with what we already have, and who we really are.
Cultivating patience and love
Modern society lives at an incredibly fast pace, surrounding us from all sides with many different stimuli that overwhelm our feelings and make us forget about the main thing.
For example, many of the achievements of modern science and technology have taught us that everything in our life should happen instantly or almost instantly – and not only in ours. We sincerely believe that we must respond to any messages as quickly as possible. And if we need a positive confirmation of our own importance in the form of “likes” or comments, then all we need for this is to upload a couple of photos to social networks.
Only now … in fact, life is not at all like that. She walks forward at her own pace. And a real, deep and strong relationship can only be created through the slow magic of days that change days, patience, respect and calm, wise attachment.
And if we learn to be more patient in this hectic world, we will be surprised to realize that it will also calm down our emotions such as anger, envy, rage and irritation.
Negative emotional states – for example, anxiety and stress – are for the most part a consequence of our desire for instantaneousness. They are generated by our fear of tomorrow, as well as the need to move into an unknown and uncertain future.
So let’s learn to accept the present through patience, and this will help us get rid of the fear of the future.
The importance of shutting down your own ego
We all know people who seem to be angry with the whole world from birth.
Yes, yes, these are the same eternally grumpy and gloomy personalities who are never satisfied with anything. Nothing lives up to their incredibly high expectations, nothing lives up to their moral, emotional, or psychological standards.
They set the bar so high for the world around them and have such an inflated ego that the whole world does not seem large and significant enough for them. Moreover, they are sincerely convinced of the wickedness of this world, which is constantly plotting against them.
Is it any wonder that such an approach to life makes their existence miserable and makes them feel like they are alone in the whole world.
Disconnecting your ego is not easy. And the reason for this is very simple – as a rule, we can easily recognize it in others, but when it comes to ourselves … This is where our ego detector fails.
Don’t be discouraged though, as you can always use these simple strategies to help you recognize, control, and calm your ego:
- First of all, you must realize how exactly your words and actions affect others.
- After that, you must open your eyes to your flaws, mistakes, and weaknesses.
- This is followed by the understanding that others do not have to be who you want, do what you need, or satisfy your needs.
- Don’t expect anything from other people. Together, set your expectations for yourself. This way you can find true balance and peace.
- You need to not only learn to accept your flaws as part of what makes you but also learn to see the good in everyone around you.
What can you say in conclusion? Fundamentals of Buddhism offers us a very interesting approach to managing our emotions.
Their greatest advantage is that they stimulate our self-knowledge, pushing us to realize that happiness lies in the depths of our soul.
So start working on yourself now and it will pay off a hundredfold!